The fateful day was exactly a year ago—May 15, 2022. Trust me, that was exactly a year ago if you adjust for Daylight Savings Time and include the hours we’ve spent staring into “the Abyss,” also known as the leak in the road. That day—May 15, 2022, in case you already forgot—was the last time the Grace in Acworth Newsletter had no updates.

That would mean yesterday, April 9, 2023, was officially the next time we had nothing submitted to post in the newsletter. How did this happen not once, but twice? We only have one person to blame. It certainly isn’t me, so between the two of us, who does that leave? 

Fortunately, I have covered for you, but this is the last time. During any other week, the newsletter would provide coverage of events you have no interest in attending and updates on things you don’t care about. Without that to fall back on, this week will include stuff that you care even less about because it’s just made up.

Ducks vs. Geese

Contrary to what you might have heard, the geese have not rented the pond for their exclusive use during the next five months. They are willing to share the space with the ducks. This assumes the ducks promise to stay off the big log in the center of the pond. If they don’t, things could get ugly and you might want to avoid the nature walk.

This image is used without permission.

Survey #1 – Covenant Contention

After taking a survey of our neighborhood, we discovered the following:

  • On Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, most Grace residents believe our covenants are too strict and probably conflict with something in the bill of rights.
  • On Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, these same residents think that this place is going to H-E-double hockey sticks because enforcement has gotten lax and someone needs to deal with the violations across the street and two houses down.
  • On Sunday, they remember they are living in Grace and it is occasionally appropriate to extend grace to others. Until the following Tuesday, at any rate.

New Clubhouse Guideline

Do not serve screw-cap wine unless you polish off the entire bottle and toss the evidence in the garbage. We have to project a certain image, even if it is only an image. 

Survey #2 – Newsletter

Participants in a recent First Friday event were asked how they felt when the newsletter is delayed for any reason.

  • 57% worry they might miss an announcement of another event where screw-cap wine is allowed.
  • 33% are grateful that they don’t have to delete yet another email.
  • 10% ask, “We have a newsletter? When did that start? No one asked me.”

Missing Person Found

One of our residents was missing for several hours last week. The story had a happy ending when a sharp-eyed neighbor found the individual had just gotten stuck in the roundabout until they ran out of gas.

Let this be a reminder to everyone to keep your tank full so this doesn’t happen to you.

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Featured Image by Markus Winkler from Pixabay